Excuses that should never see the light of day
Welcome back honey!Last week I brought out a book that the ExcuseGal’s parents kept when she was little. It contained all the creative and unbelievable excuses that she had given from ages 4 thru 8. Well, I guess that gave the ExcuseGal the idea to continue the book on her own when she got old enough to do so. So today I'm bringing out The Excuse Book.
Inside these 150 lined pages are over 2000 excuses for just about every topic imaginable. And they’re grouped by topic. As you can see, there are notes here about each excuse. When it was used, who it was told to, etc. Some have smiley faces next to them, which means they were successful. Others have been crossed out completely, which means that for one reason or another they didn’t work.
Now, as I said, there are a lot of excuses in here. Over 2000 by my count. One of my hobbies was actually sitting down to think about hypothetical scenarios that might need excuses, so I could be prepared when they actually happened. The problem with this book, is that some of these excuses were written when I was only 7 or so. So, not only are they nearly illegible, they’re also not very believable.
There are some excuses that are so lame, they just need to be retired from the excuse book altogether. Today I will be reading from the Excuse Book some of my more juvinile excuses from when I was a little ExcuseGal. I’m also going to be crossing off each one with a permanent marker to forever expel them from the book.
Bad Dream: "I can’t go to school today because I had a bad dream."
- I have since refined this and turned it into a valid boyfriend excuse.
Stuffed: "I don’t want to eat dinner because I’m still full from last night’s dinner."
- This one is a pretty flimsy excuse because, well, it’s just stupid. Especially when you just the same excuse two for not eating last night’s dinner.
Dog Gone It: "The dog hid my shoes and I can’t go to school without shoes."
-Maybe if I was a boy, this would work. But girls always have more than one pair of shoes.
No School: "My teacher said today she wasn’t going to class today so we should stay home."
-This is the day mom told me all about the miracle of substitute teachers.
A New Macbook and a New Friend
This has been a fun week for the ExcuseGal. Last Saturday I finally got my very own Macbook. It's my first computer ever (aside from this pink Barbie Learning-Fun laptop I had when I was 6) and I'm already in love with it. The best part about my purchase? It turns out that my neighbor has wi-fi and he's broadcasting a totally unlocked signal. This means I have totally free wi-fi! Thanks "BEJERNUD"!
The worst part about my computer is definitely it's built-in webcam. It's not that it's low quality or doesn't work right, the reason I consider it the worst feature is that now I have no excuse for not posting video blog posts. Before I owned a computer, I was able to hide behind the shroud of poorly constructed senteinces and non sequitur images. Now every time I go to write a blog post, there's this tiny little camera staring me in the face. It's like my computer is challenging me to make a video post. Well, I accept your challenge Macbook!
Without further ado, here is the very first video post on A Good Excuse Blog!
So, I'm sure after watching that you have many questions. First one being, "how'd I land such a cutie to be the face of A Good Excuse Blog?" Well, as he mentioned (let's just call him ExcuseGuy from now on), ExcuseGuy is a classmate of mine at school. We've been in the same 3D Design class for a month and I was talking to him about my blog. He mentioned the he's studying social media and video communication, so I said to myself "I've gotta get this guy involved with the blog".
The best part about having ExcuseGuy do the video posts is that there's still no real connection to me. Since none of my friends or co-workers go to school with me, there's no way anybody who sees ExcuseGuy can link him back to me. My identity is thus kept secret so that I may continue to come up with great excuses for you all. And it's great for ExcuseGuy because he's just the conveyor of the excuses, so all his friends won't be all mad at him all the time since he's not actually using these excuses in real life. (I am).
To sum up, I, ExcuseGal, will continue to update the blog with new excuses. I'll still keep in touch with you all with Twitter and Facebook. The only change around here is that I'll be having ExcuseGuy make all the video posts for the site. If I ever get enough confidence, maybe I'll help him out on a post or two as well. Check back soon for more awesome excuses!